I need you to conduct an important exercise right now. You don’t have to move from where you are, and it won’t steal more than three minutes of your time.
Look around – take stock of the environment that surrounds you, and all the things you don’t like about it.
I’m sure you are facing immense obstacles, and I’m sure that in some way, shape or form, these obstacles are making you feel alienated from your environment.
You’ve questioned why the circumstances brought you here, and what your life would be like had things unfolded differently.
You’re waiting for a plan to move past the things that limit you and rise into a much more fulfilling reality.
You’re ready to leave, ready to move on, ready to change what doesn’t work and leave this behind.
But you’re forgetting the most important key needed to turn those desires into action…
It is a paradigm-shift that will immediately transform your perspective on many of the most pressing questions you have about your life this year.
Are you ready for it? Here it is: You chose this for yourself. You wanted to be here. You wished for things to unfold this way. You picked this chapter of your life (along with all the limitations that feel disempowering).
It doesn’t matter how difficult your circumstances are, how little you could have foreseen about your current issues, or how many of the things that led you here were out of your control.
You are standing here because you knew this would happen to you, and you understood it was what you needed. You picked these challenges. You picked these restrictions. You picked these obstacles.
Your initial reaction will be somewhat like mine: “Did I really choose all of that though?”
It depends on how you want to see it.
There are many spiritual philosophies that would explain that you selected your present challenges long before you were even born.
They would say that you understood, from the great beyond, how important it was for you to experience these problems, and how much your soul needed to be challenged by them. You picked them for the year you are living them, at the age you are living them, so you could empower yourself to rise above them.
There are other equally popular spiritual philosophies that would claim there is a direct link between your deepest subconscious thoughts and the circumstances you continue to attract into your reality.
There is also the logical perspective: your current reality is simply the outcome of the complex web of choices you have been making over the past nine years (the jobs you took, the things you spent your money on, the priorities you made, and the ways you combined them into your present circumstances).
From a million different angles, in a thousand different ways, it is clear that the obstacles sitting on your lap today…were actually created by you. You own them. They are yours and no one else’s.
I find this basic truth to be deeply empowering. It forces you to start thinking about what you can control, rather than what is completely out of your hands. It forces you to focus on the things that are your responsibility, rather than something for “luck” or “someone else” to resolve on your behalf.
They push you to look at everything from the optimist’s perspective (“however shitty this may feel, it is inherently good and deeply important for me”).
Like pure magic, these philosophies transform your problems into blessings, allowing you to understand the opportunities hidden behind the challenges that would otherwise only cause you unnecessary pain.
Think about it: it doesn’t matter if you really chose this for yourself or didn’t. The truth remains the same: you are not powerless.
You are not a victim of your circumstances. You are not a slave to the people whose choices have complicated your present life. You are not beholden to the whims of luck or chance. You are not permanently condemned to your financial situation, or your relationship, or anything else that you feel may be holding you back.
Your life is always in your hands. Your obstacles are the only ingredients you have to build the life of your dreams.
So long as you keep your mind locked in the victimhood loop (where someone or something is doing this to you), you will disempower yourself to do something about it.
So long as you dwell on dissecting why others are MORE RESPONSIBLE or how YOU DON’T DESERVE THIS or why THIS KEEPS HAPPENING TO YOU, you will have no time to apply your creativity into designing and implementing a solution that will bring you closer to the things you want.
The only way to get yourself to a better place is to understand the role you played in what brought you here, regardless of how much fault lies in others or external forces.
Try applying this philosophy now:
Why would you have chosen this for yourself?
How did you create this for yourself?
Why did you think this was the best way of learning what you needed to learn?
Why were you convinced that this was the only way to get what you want in life?
How would this actually be the very best thing that could ever happen to you?
There is a reason you have brought yourself here. There is a reason you feel trapped and are aching to get out. You chose this. You made this. You are responsible for turning it into something great.
Something important is hidden beneath this experience.
The key to your freedom is hiding somewhere beneath these questions. The moment you figure it out you will literally trigger change into action.
Once you unlock the key, keep going, and never look back!
Andrew Gabelic is the CEO & Founder of Teledipity, a free pocket life coach with an eerie ability to send you the right self-improvement content at the right time (based on your personality and life stage). Check out what it says about you!